Creating Your Own Success - From Corporate Dream to Personal Brand

If you’ve been struggling to find out what your career path is or what success means to you, this episode is for you. So let’s get started.

First I want to tell you a story of this little girl who has always wanted to climb that corporate ladder and work in that tall skyscraper in a big city.

She always dreamed of wearing all black in heels, walking to work with a cup of coffee in her hand, and sitting in an office that overlooks the buildings of a big city.

From Corporate Dream to Burnout

So she did just that. She went to architecture school, worked from a small firm to a large firm to slowly climb my way up to a big international firm.

Oh yea that girl is me.

I still remember the first day I went to work at Rockefeller Center as I pushed on the brass handle of the big heavy revolving door - I thought to myself “I made it”.

This was the dream I’ve always wanted as a little kid, and I did it.

And then as time went by, I sat at my 5-foot desk in an open office with painted concrete ceiling and unlimited cups of bad coffee...relentlessly working days and nights.

I spent a whole year working until midnight every night and every single weekend.

I would go back to the office to work after having dinner with my oversea relatives that came to visit.

I would live and eat in the office everyday and the worst part was - I was proud of it.

I was proud of myself for putting endless hours into making my project perfect.

I was proud that the leadership always praised me for my hard work.

Then I hit a massive burnout. You know, that feeling that you’re so tired but you’re so wired up that you end up waking up with a headache every single day.

So bad so that I started to take every Thursday off from work cause I just couldn’t leave my bed.

I stopped calling my family in HK because, well, who has the time?

This burnout episode led me to a whole journey of rethinking what I really wanted in life.

Feeling Lost

Now, this is usually the part of the story where someone had a big revelation and realized what their true purpose is in life.

But it didn’t quite happen that easily for me.

I mean - I’ve been living my life wanting that corporate dream and you’re telling me now I need to redefine my entire life?

That’s really really hard…

It’s like throwing the life away that you’ve worked so hard for.

So I just felt really lost for at least 3 years.

I still went ahead and got my license as an architect. But on the side, I tried everything outside of architecture to find my new meaning.

I started multiple blogs, I went into selling tea, I tried making jewelry, I tried writing about career advice, I tried selling resume templates… I even made a video on how to fold plastic bags.

It was a mess.

I didn’t know what I wanted, but I just knew deep down that what I had wasn’t it.

It was this feeling like you’re in this dark void and you’re by yourself searching for a light that’s just not there.

But you know what, I just kept trying.

The Wrong Definition of Success

I kept my job.

Because what I realized was that the problem wasn’t the job.

The problem was that my definition of success was wrong.

My definition of success was about the job, the power, the status - you know - being the cool architect in the big city, getting promoted, and I thought all of that would make me happy.

But it didn’t and it took a long time for me to realize that.

Redefining Your Own Version of Success

I went on a deep journey to find out what I really want - not just in my career, but in my life. In today’s episode, I want to share with you the 3 biggest lessons I’ve learned in figuring out my own definition of success.

So if you’re struggling to figure out what success means to you like I was, I hope this can help you.

1 - What Does Success Look Like to You?

See, in the middle of trying new things, I also started personal brand coaching.

And it just felt right.

It felt like I belong here and that I’m actually making an impact in someone’s life.

It felt like I’m just exactly where I should be - helping other architects who are like me to succeed in their lives.

That’s what success means to me - making an impact and helping other people.

So I changed my entire mindset.

Success is getting a DM from another member in the community that said she got her new job during the pandemic.

Success is mentoring younger team members at work or outside of work and seeing them flourish.

Success is knowing that the work I put out in the world actually makes an impact.

Even if it’s just inspiring someone to take a little bit of action in their life.

2 - Forget About What Other People Think

To redefine your own success is absolutely terrifying.

You’re basically throwing away hundreds of years of expectations from society and just selfishly focusing on yourself.

Is it weird to say out loud that you don’t really need another promotion?

That working in the shiny skyscraper no longer makes you happy?

It’s terrifying how much we care about what other people think about us.

So much so that I didn’t tell anyone at work about personal brand coaching when I first started it.

I thought everyone was gonna judge me. I thought they were going to ask me how I have so much extra time on hand to do these extra passion projects.

Because I thought...building an online community or coaching is NOT what a typical architect should be doing.

I was also a little embarrassed that I had to do something outside of the normal architecture tasks to find fulfillment in life.

I thought that just means I’m not a good architect - right? Like who does that...

But guess what?

No one cares.

Once I became open at work about what I’m doing with my personal brand and sharing my blog posts with them. Everyone at work said good things about it.

Whenever I show up on an article online, or podcast interviews, they all say that they’re proud of me and they’re grateful to have a leader like me in the team.

People are actually happy that I’m putting myself out there to help other architects in our industry.

3 - Carve Your Own Path

Now I’ve been doing this for a few years now but sometimes I still feel a little scared of judgment because this is really not what a normal architect would do.

There is no roadmap for me. I can’t just follow a study guide and pass a few exams to get to a destination.

I mean I don’t even know where the destination is.

But without a destination in mind, the journey just feels right.

Before I started talking about personal branding, there wasn’t really much discussion on this in architecture.

I honestly don’t know what I’m doing, but from my own personal experience, I’ve seen firsthand how personal branding helped grow my career so I just wanted to talk about it.

When you’re creating your own version of success, there is literally only you on this really unique path that you’ve carved out for yourself.

And you have to find your own way.

But it doesn’t mean you’re alone in your journey. There are always going to be people including me to support you.

It just means you have to go through a lot of trial and error. You have to be willing to try it, fail it, and restart again.

It means that you have to keep building up and showing up for yourself.

Not for your job. Not for your parents. And definitely not for your boss.

But for yourself.

Create Your Own Success Journey

So there you have it. That was a long journey to share with you, but I feel that it’s important that we talk about this.

I’m not sure where my journey is gonna take me. But if you’re experiencing what I was experiencing, feeling doubtful about your “dream job”, not knowing what your next goals are.

Just know that sometimes...

It takes getting to where you thought you wanted to be to know that it’s not where you’re meant to be.

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